Friday, July 17, 2020

Dear Spencer... You are ONE.


I stared at you for a little while as I rocked you to sleep and you finished your baba. I studied your chubby little ankles, one crossed over the other. Your stick straight blonde baby hair, sky blue eyes, and the little round edge of your nose. I thought back to all that we've been through this year. The hundreds of hours we've spent snuggled up together, watching you grow and change daily. As I sat down to write this, I dug out a packet of mint tea from the back of the kitchen drawer... I loved to drink it when I was pregnant with you. I just can't believe you are one year old.

Even though tonight I was rubbing your little knee through a hole you've burned in your jammies from all your crawling, you are walking now. You started taking steps here and there almost two weeks ago. Now you can take 10-15 at a time. You are pretty wobbly still, but your brothers and sister get so excited to see you walk. You have 4 little teeth, have become a ferocious eater (you eat pretty much anything we put on your high chair, so we are taking full advantage of introducing all we can), and you are growing like a weed. You are still smooshing into 12 month sizes...  but 18 month sizes are on deck and ready. Daddy loves to call you an 'angry' eater because as soon as you've eaten everything we set on your tray, you will scream at us until we get more on there.

You love water - you are a water baby. We celebrated your first birthday a little early at Pop's beach with family. You played in the sand, swam in the water, went on the tube with daddy for a short little ride, and rode on the wave runner and boat. You are such a chill little guy and loved taking in all of the activity around you. You hated your cake and cried the entire time we sang to you (in true Lesher fashion). We are celebrating your actual birthday with a little more cake and presents.

You are wearing size 4 diapers and just started wearing shoes. These shoes are special because they're the same first shoes Nolan and Cody both wore and I love seeing them on your little feet. You dislike having your diaper changed and you cry after every bath while we get you ready for bed. You do love the bath, though, and we try to let them last as long as possible in the evenings so you can play. You are in to everything... cabinets, drawers, remotes, legos, our shower, and anything you aren't supposed to have. Your new favorite skill is climbing on the coffee table to scare us all since you haven't figured out how to get down yet. 

You are quite the mama's boy and I absolutely love it. You always reach for me and I can usually find you at my feet if I am not holding you. You also are crazy about your daddy and Pops, too. Gramz and you have connected in the past few months and I love seeing your bond grow with them. I am so filled with love when I watch you play with your brothers and sister. Sometimes I can't find you and you are always with one of them. Andie and Nolan love to carry you around and show you everything. Cody will drive around his tractor with you in the attached trailer. It is so fun to see you all play and work together. Andie feeds you your bottles in the car and makes sure you always have a Paci if you need it. Nolan can see you through the crack in the seat and I can always tell when he is interacting with you because you will laugh at everything he does. You all are building such a little bond and it is my favorite thing. You all are so special to me.

We have been going on bike rides together (you do really well riding in the burley with Cody), swimming in the pool, and spending a lot of time inside playing with toys. You are taking a regular nap still, usually everyday between noon and 2, sometimes more or less. You go to bed at 7pm every night and you've had probably 7 or 8 nights where you have gone all night. Most nights you are still up once to see me for a diaper change and drink. You go right back to bed, usually, and I get a little sleepy snuggle in.

You have so many nicknames, most notably: Spencie, Spencer-bear, Spencie-bear, Spanky (Pops), and baby. Cody calls you "Spe-cee" or "Spe-cer" (no 'n'). We haven't done any traveling in the last several months, so we have all really spent a lot of time together at home. 

2020 has been a turbulent year. Our world is deep in the midst of a pandemic, Covid-19. So far, we have yet to have the virus hit our home, but we've been keeping a distance from most of our extended family and friends since March. Luckily, we've slowly opened up that circle and you've been able to spend a lot of time with our close family and a group of our close friends since May. Thousands more people are getting infected every day and next month schools will still be closed, keeping your siblings home to learn. Our society has also been fighting a war against racism. It's one that should have been kicked away generations ago, but we all are working to build communities focused on inclusion, kindness, and love. So many intense changes surround us, our country has had some tough times this year... but right here in our little tiny world - our family has focused in on doing what we can to start that love at home.

No matter what the world brings to you in your life, you must always know that you have your family. We are all together in this life and my life would not be complete with out you. Spencer, you are so special to me. I will never be able to articulate in words how much you mean to me, but I hope you feel it. I am so proud and blessed to be your mommy. I am grateful every single day for your smile. You give me hope and happiness. I hope you never have any fear in being yourself, I hope you are always kind, and I hope to always live close and be close to you and your siblings. You are a very special little boy.

I will never understand why time goes so fast, but it sure makes me appreciate it all. I love you forever and ever, Spence. You are here for a reason.


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